ohh` im back from my Genting trip. simply love my darling alot. wee~ i know i give you attitude and make you angry la. i know is my fault, but is not all just my fault ok! they too have fault alright.  anyway, i dont wish to talk about those sad things. cus there's more happy times than unhappy times. as long as there is you to accompany me, im happy.

 

ohh` i bought for my darling RENOMA's undies, PADINI's boxers & sockies. LOL~  darling very good..give me RM100 for shopping. yup` bought myself a sandals. i love it alot, thanks darling.  

 

day 2 - Ivan, Darling & me went to Snow World together. hoho` its fun alright. we throw the ice at each other. poor me kena bully by ivan & darling. they throw ice into my boots & make my leg freeze. @#!$#^$  but its fun la. LOL~ we ask the photographer to help us take pics. wahaha~  after that, we eat delicious food. we eat 2 crab, black pepper & mushroom flavour & 1 butter cheese prawn. wooo~ its damn delicious ok. im drooling. LOL~ can u imagine, 2 crab each weigh 300g & 1 butter cheese prawn weigh 300g only for RM110+. my goodness, its CHEAP ok.

 

day 3 - we're going back to SINGAPORE. ohh` wad a waste man! the midst is clear & finally the outdoor theme park is open. we do not have enough time to play the rides. holy shit! but nevermind, we go play bumper car & archery. LOL~ funny part is we go play archery, i dont even know how to shoot & end up most of it drop onto the floor. only some i manage to poke it in the circle. LOL~ shoot until my finger & arm so pain & tiring. wahaha~  but then, its still fun! another funny part is when playing bumper car. i go bang 1 small boy, then darling bang me from the back & my head knock until the pole & my beanie drop. @!#@%$^#!

 

lastly, i hate you FELIX SOH!! u're simply not a MAN & dont call yourself a MAN ok!! it will make me puke.  such a coward & dont even admit that you're also in a fault. OMG~ pls la... at least i admit i give attitude all this but partly is because of YOU ok. i never say "ENTIRELY" your fault. so dont say i just pointing my finger at you, FELIX SOH.

woohoooo~ 2 more days i'll be going to Genting with my darling & frens.

 

now raining season, dont know if the Theme Park is open anot. hopefully, we go there can have some fun rides yea. hmm, i dont wanna miss the Snow World.  if really raining over there & cant play the rides, well, we will go for shopping spree @ KL. i think RYAN must be damn happy if can go shopping. wahaha......

 

hopefully, my damn gross wounds recover fast. else i'll cry like hell.  3 days never go work liao.. pay also being deducted, so sad.  next month my pay sure very less. gonna cry out loud.  

 

GOD ~ BLESS ME & GIVE ME MONEY!!!

my feeling right now:- frustrated, hurt, sad & sucks.

 

maybe im being too kpo but i really dont mean to. i jus telling the truth as im not someone who like to LIE!! cus i simply hate LIARS too. if the truth will hurt me or make me angry, i would rather face it than avoiding it. i would rather know the truth & know what i should do than being lied & make myself like a FOOL. sometimes i know that not knowing the truth, it may be a good thing. but have you ever thought that if one day you were to found out the truth & you're the last to know it, how would you feel? i can tell you, it will be 10x, 100x, 1000x more painful & hurtful than if you know it earlier. WHEN SOMEONE LIE TO YOU, DOESNT MEAN THEY DONT LOVE YOU. IS JUST THAT THEY DONT WISH TO SEE YOU SAD, HURT OR ANGRY. BUT ON ANOTHER HAND, THE OTHER PARTY MAY THINK IT DIFFERENTLY.

 

GUYS JUST DONT UNDERSTAND GIRLS WELL; & SO DOES GIRLS DONT UNDERSTAND GUYS WELL TOO!!

 

HE just dont understand me!! SAD~ PLS~ dont scold me using that 4 letter words. it hurts me alot. maybe you dont even care about my feeling anymore. its alright. i cant stop you from scolding me using vulgarity as that's your mouth. you speak wahtever you like. im not your mum or whoever to teach you manners.

 

maybe im afraid to lose you, cus i dont know how would i live my day without you. i dont know how to face the truth, i dont know how to walk out of my darkness when you're not there to see me thru.

 

lastly, i just wanna let you know that I REALLY LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART!!

 

NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WHEN IM POSSIBLE. I CAN ACTUALLY LIKE SOMEONE WHOM I HATE MOST!! -UNBELIEVABLE!!

 

im too sad & hurt.. i need CHIVAS right now!! there you'll be~

 

WO AI DE REN, SHANG WO ZUI SHEN!! -TONG KU....

ohhh ~ today went to watch Casino Royal with HIM @ Bishan J8. LOL~ ya, nice show & luckily i did watch it. so long didnt watch movie with HIM & now... wow ~ watch 2 movies with HIM le.. last time we always like to go watch movie @ Toa Payoh... ya, really miss those days........

 

 

hmm` saw a nice dress today @ Bishan J8. well` i like it & the price is reasonable la. $46.90 for a dress... hmmmmmmm... dont know is it very expensive. wanna have a look at it but... cant leh... running out of time.. rushing to go buy movie ticket. other day i go see see & buy myself bah.

 

finally its weekend again. rest day for me after 5 tiring & boring working days. hmm` cant wait to go Genting now. everyday im thinking of Genting. LOL~ well`i need to buy long sleeve clothing as i do not really have one. hmm` shall go for shopping tomorrow & see.

 

im waiting for HIM to be back home & back to my heart... i'll always wait for you to return...

 

LOVE YOU ~

yep, HE promise to accompany me go Genting on 21st Dec to 23rd Dec 06.  well, Ryan, Ivan & a fat girl is going with us too. Imran, Shi Zhong and Khee Tia will join us later on. yippie, so long never go Genting le. I think its gonna be more interesting and adventure than before. cant wait to go...... yoohooo~ tomorrow me & HIM gonna book the ticket for the trip le. so excited now. im very happy cus HE's going with me. yoohooo~ i wanna go the Snow World, cus i never went and experience snow before. i wanna go the Theme Park, cus i love exciting games (eg. ROLLERCOASTER ~ BrooooM....)

 

if only im rich now, i wanna buy these things before i go Genting:-

[] boots

[] gloves & stocking

[] winter coat / jacket

[] winter clothing

[] jeans

[] scarf

[] winter earphone

 

if only im rich now, i wanna go for a HAIRCUT @ CHAPTER 2.

 

if only me & HIM can be back together again before we go Genting. i wish it will comes true... PRAY HARD!!

 

I MISS HIM LOADS NOW~

ohhh` last sat took my baby Jader go for grooming. yep, decided to cut botak for him. 2 hours later, i shall see a brand new Jader. so during this 2 hours, i went to the coffeeshop to have my fav chicken rice. after eating, went over to his place to put the things which i spend overnight to complete and wanted to give him as a surprise when he's back home. so fast, its time for me to go fetch Jader back home. im on my way, he called. he ask me to wait for him at the shop as he wana see his baby Jader. alright, we waited for him. when i reach the shop to bring Jader home, omg~ i cant recognize him. a dog just run out from the grooming room and run around the shop. i see and say, ohhh~ whose dog is that?? so ugly!! lol~ then, steven laugh and said, of cus is your Jader la. i was like, REALLY ANOT?? how could it be my dog?? omg~ i carry him and indeed, its my dog ok. i cant stop laughing and here he came. below is Jader's before and after haircut pics. dont u think he changes alot?? dont even look like him in the past. so cute and adorable. now, look like alien. Jader, dont worry. mummy will still love you alright??

 

yep, 2 years ago we have a misunderstanding and end up, we broke up our brother-sistership. we were so damn close in the past, like real brother and sister. we joke around, fun around and when there's trouble, we never fail to help one another. ya, that's was in the past. one day, our brother-sistership just shattered into pieces. all b'cus of one f**ker alright. whenever i look back, i think im dumb to have trust a f**ker so much. b'cus of that useless f**ker, i sacrifies my most important and closes brother. hais. well, after 2 years, they contacted me again. yoohooo~ im happy. i dont know if they have forgiven me, but im really happy that they will still contact me after 2 years since we lost contact. well, i simply miss their jokes. "PUKIMA" ya, that's what we always call each other. "UHHH, SUP??" that's our greeting whenever we answer the call. LOL~ still got alot la.....

 

for HIM... anyway, hope you'll like the things i've make for you. actually thought of giving you a surprise. nevermind la... its the same. you'll still see it. i just hope that you'll always remember the time we spent together, our memories. thanks so much for accompanying me to watch Happy Feet. i enjoyed it, so did you?? so sorry to cause your bike to break down in expressway. i shouldnt be so itchy hand to keep taking pic when you're riding. grr~ so sorry.

 

hmm, today mum called me. well, she said something which make me feel so eerie...... she told me... sis last night had a bad dream of me murdering a guy. alright, the guy if im not wrong is HIM. and its the second time my sis had the same dream. well` do you think i'll murder anyone?? hmm... mum asked GOD... GOD said, joy has put too hard and seriously into this relationship; and thus she dont know how to let go. hmm~ after hearing what mum has told me, my tears roll down my cheek. well` i cried is b'cus its so true of what GOD has said. maybe i really dont know how to let go, cus i really love him alot. yupe, I MEAN ALOT!! i love him more than anything else. now that i've lost him in my life, i dont know what to do?? i cant help but break down, and cry. i look back at my mistakes, i blame myself. but what can i do now?? i have tried to salvage the relationship. i really tried very hard to... but.........

 

ohhh` just waiting for you to return to my heart........

hais... im very stress today. im really gonna break down soon. i cant take it anymore. i rather die then living my life each day like hell. oh` worst than hell. everyday im thinking of so much and yet i cant do anything, find no answer for it. i tried and tried... but..... too sad and hurt. im in office now. i really feel like going off now. i cant continue with my work. my brain is freeze, cant even concentrate on my work now. idling the whole day, im bored. i need a long break right now. sometimes, i really feel like just ending my life. cus i find nothing in this world to make me carry on with my life. hais......... how i wish im not born.. so i dont have to see this world.. get so much hurts..

 

im too sad and hurt.. stress is going to make me gone bonker soon.. i cant hold on anymore, gonna break down soon.... real soon..

 

Life simply sucks...

 

If only im dead... How good it will be..............................................

 

JOY IS DEAD AT THIS MOMENT!!!